New Car Full

Yeah, so this is me, sweating it out in this hot stinky garage, splicing some kind of metal objects together.  The boss doesn't know I have no idea what I'm doing.  I just got out of jail three weeks ago and have no training in auto parts or nothing.  I was thrown in jail at age 16 for hitting the Swedish diplomate with a cheese dog (he turned at the precise moment the dog was sailing towards his mouth and that processed meat treat landed squarely in his trachea!), and have not had a job since.  In the joint I learned about some car things from my cell mate.  He nicknamed me "Cooter" because I guess I reminded him of the eponymous rascally mechanic from the legendary show.

So anyway, I got this job in a garage fixin' cars.   I have not fixed one yet, but I have cost the owner $50,000 in damages to cars I've tinkered with.  He is a really swell, Christian type who believes I have a chance at redeeming myself and just need some more confidence.  What I really need is a basic understanding of cars, and a better means of asking for help.  I do know how to pump gas and turn on the engine of a care by using a standard car key and wrist supination maneuver.

As a way of supplementing my soon to be evanescent income from this job, I hope to post some really excellent coupons in this blog.  I also hope to feature some guest posts from other would-be, charlatan auto repairmen (you wouldn't believe how many mechanics don't know what the hell they are doing either, how funny!).  I will also explain to you things I learn about auto parts on wikipedia, broken down in to a language that other ex-cons might be able to understand.

God bless the good old USA, and god bless coupons for auto parts, those ubiquitous inducements to buy car parts!